I hate that I can visualize this greentext so easily.
The fact that they show a Dark Souls poster and proceed to describe an Elden ring movie is very funny. Like the producers don’t know the difference.
they’d be proud of the fact that they never played video games, let alone the source material.
look at interviews surrounding halo paramount, “we want to tell our own story in this setting” then proceeds to make garbage that actively disrespects the source.
“We didn’t look at the game. We didn’t talk about the game. We talked about the characters and the world. So I never felt limited by it being a game.”
The quote is amazing.
that’s an even better quote than the one I remembered
“Ah sweet, a new Miyazaki film!”
Wrong Miyazaki! Go back!
*gets bogged down in poison swamp*
They need to combine forces so Studio Ghibli makes a Dark Souls/Elden Ring movie, and Fromsoft makes a game about Princess Mononoke or something.
Would a dark souls movie actively keep anyone with a handicap from entering the theater?
“In order to enter the theatre, you need to be able to get past The Wall.”
I absolutely hate this, but can’t deny that it’s accurate
Tbh, i’d love a dark souls movie with Jack Black and Nick Cage.
Jack Black as Solaire would work. I can see the jolly cooperation now
And a shaven Adam Sandler as patches. This would truly be an awful film. I’d see it. Not in theaters, certainly. Not even my own streaming subscription. But eventually I’ll be on someone’s couch and exactly drunk enough to dare them to put it on.
This is how I ended up seeing Sonic 3.
Did I enjoy Jim Carrey? Yes, very much so.
Do I want to go back and see Sonic 2, which I completely missed? No.You did it right
You’re on the money, Cageman is who this movie needs
Nick Cage
Ew.
I’m on board for Jack Black though.
That actually sounds incredible lmao
Honestly, anything w/ Jack Black is incredible. He somehow saved the Minecraft movie for me by turning it into a weird School of Rock nostalgia trip.
That was unfortunately a Jack Black of a different era. This one abandons his lifelong friend to be as hollywood safe as possible for saying meanie-bobeanie things about trump (as a comedian on a stage that is known for political jokes)
Yup. Most that you can fault it for, is the mechanics later in the game, which try to teach you how to play multiplayer, getting too repetetive.
Because of course the game had PvP battling with music stages as bases.
I think the main issue people had was it had lot of RTS sections further in.
They weren’t actually that bad, but the demo gave no clue that the main chunk of gameplay was going to be running around issuing orders rather than the basic heavy metal themed hack-and-slash it pretended to be.
Pretty good soundtrack too.
Movie is called Dark Souls, plot is Elden Ring. Hollywood on par for the course.
Reminds me of the director Jon Peters who wanted a giant spider in Superman and was shot down. So he got Wild West and put a giant spider in there.
Hollywood does whatever Hollywood wants.
“they ruined it! There aren’t even bonfires in elden ring! In lore theyre called this-games-thing!”
Fuck it, I’m down
The “Who let the dogs out” soundtrack made me lose my shit.
You know, I don’t think I’ve ever heard that song in full. Apparently the dogs are metaphorical
The dogs were let out. They aren’t gonna stick around and finish the song for you.
THIS SUMMER, ROB SCHNEIDER DOOP DE DERP DEE DOODLEY DERP
This summer, unfortunately, Rob Schneider is
going, FULL MAGA.
zoom in on Schnieder doing a goofy face while wearing a red baseball cap as a slide whistle plays and he says “Who’s afraid of the big, bad gays?”
Now playing Elle King - The Let Go
(Rob Schneider’s daughter)
You can do it Rob Schneider’s daughter! Sing your fucking heart out!
“What? Who cares? YOU’LL WATCH IT. Fuck you.”
Was the minecraft movie ai generated
AI will create this movie 20 years from now, I hope you’re happy.
Psh there’s probably some Jabroni already working on it as we speak
I’m predicting 20 months
“Rock of Ages” was good too
It might be one of the only jukebox musicals I don’t want to kill with a brick, but let’s aim higher
