Same here, everytime I see a post like this I think that I may be on the spectrum, but on the other hand I don’t see any benefit on getting diagnosed now other than curiosity.
Also makes me wonder what else I’ve believed it’s completely common, but it’s not.
Ohhhhhh no.
So… I’m a late diagnosed fuck head. I had that same train of thought. Here’s what actually happens.
You get put on meds that make absolute, dead ass silence tolerable.
That in and of itself is surreal.
Then you explore more. Find these new limits without the constant distraction.
Immediately feel ripped off by life realizing how many more actual important things you could’ve stomped out in a day without a weeks worth of planning and monkey paw style wishes and false promises.
Pivot to hating everyone “normal” for “being lazy and not using this inherent super power”. (This sounds familiar? Lazy. Just need discipline! Boot straps!)
Slowly realize now YOU have the actual super power.
Get used to the meds. Become reliant on them to even be half as functional as you were when they were new, though still significantly better than you were, it is never like that first month.
Queue exploring other medications with your doctor who assures you they care, but now you’re suspect for asking instead of being offered.
These are controlled substances, after all.
Maybe now you’re not addicted to being normal and productive, and can actually function more than base survival.
Jesus fuck holy hell this was me down to the letter. Only difference was my meds worked for probably a year, which made the drop in productivity even more obvious. Like a ‘why brain no worky’ moment that just curved down over time. I had other shit going on though that I like to partially attribute, plus my med spiking up to 450 a month was enough for me to get off meds which was even more horrifyingly bad. Now 2 years later I’m back to being unproductive and kicking myself 10 times harder because I know what I’m capable of. Queue the endless anxiety / stress / guilt cycle. Now I have to go through finding another doc, then 6 months of scaling whatever med, that’s if I ever remember after work that I need to do it to begin with. Only time I ever remember is laying in bed at night losing sleep because of the amount of anxiety I have from not performing.
I’m stealing this for the next psychologist and/or psychiatrist appointment; more or less sums up my goals and expectations for ADHD treatment (although I’m not especially interested in stimulant meds, pharmacy juggling to find meds in stock sounds like hell)
Protip: Tell the doctor it’s wearing off too early so they increase your dosage. Only take the normal amount until you have a month backup stockpile, then renew your script at a lower rate. The doctor will understand if you’re only renewing every other month because you forget or don’t bother to take it some mornings.
Same here, everytime I see a post like this I think that I may be on the spectrum, but on the other hand I don’t see any benefit on getting diagnosed now other than curiosity.
Also makes me wonder what else I’ve believed it’s completely common, but it’s not.
Ohhhhhh no. So… I’m a late diagnosed fuck head. I had that same train of thought. Here’s what actually happens.
You get put on meds that make absolute, dead ass silence tolerable.
That in and of itself is surreal.
Then you explore more. Find these new limits without the constant distraction.
Immediately feel ripped off by life realizing how many more actual important things you could’ve stomped out in a day without a weeks worth of planning and monkey paw style wishes and false promises.
Pivot to hating everyone “normal” for “being lazy and not using this inherent super power”. (This sounds familiar? Lazy. Just need discipline! Boot straps!)
Slowly realize now YOU have the actual super power.
Get used to the meds. Become reliant on them to even be half as functional as you were when they were new, though still significantly better than you were, it is never like that first month.
Queue exploring other medications with your doctor who assures you they care, but now you’re suspect for asking instead of being offered.
These are controlled substances, after all. Maybe now you’re not addicted to being normal and productive, and can actually function more than base survival.
Nope. This must be an addiction issue.
Rinse and repeat.
Welcome to the show.
This is still better than being ignored.
Jesus fuck holy hell this was me down to the letter. Only difference was my meds worked for probably a year, which made the drop in productivity even more obvious. Like a ‘why brain no worky’ moment that just curved down over time. I had other shit going on though that I like to partially attribute, plus my med spiking up to 450 a month was enough for me to get off meds which was even more horrifyingly bad. Now 2 years later I’m back to being unproductive and kicking myself 10 times harder because I know what I’m capable of. Queue the endless anxiety / stress / guilt cycle. Now I have to go through finding another doc, then 6 months of scaling whatever med, that’s if I ever remember after work that I need to do it to begin with. Only time I ever remember is laying in bed at night losing sleep because of the amount of anxiety I have from not performing.
I’m stealing this for the next psychologist and/or psychiatrist appointment; more or less sums up my goals and expectations for ADHD treatment (although I’m not especially interested in stimulant meds, pharmacy juggling to find meds in stock sounds like hell)
Protip: Tell the doctor it’s wearing off too early so they increase your dosage. Only take the normal amount until you have a month backup stockpile, then renew your script at a lower rate. The doctor will understand if you’re only renewing every other month because you forget or don’t bother to take it some mornings.
I felt the same as you. For Decades. Testing and treatment changed my life dramatically for the better.