Let me preface by saying, I would love to hear counter points and am fully open to the fact that I could be wrong and totally out of touch. I just want to have some dialogue around something that’s been bothering me in the fediverse.

More and more often I keep hearing people refer to “normies”. I think by referring to other people as “normies”, whether you intend to or not, you inadvertently gatekeep and create an exclusive environment rather than an inclusive one in the fediverse.

If I was not that familiar with the fediverse and decided to check it out and the first thing I read was a comment about “normies”, I would quite honestly be very put off. It totally has a negative connotation and doesn’t even encapsulate any one group. I just read a comment about someone grouping a racist uncle and funny friend into the same category of normie because they aren’t up to date on the fediverse or super tech savvy or whatever.

I don’t want to see any Meta bs in the fediverse. I barely want to see half of the stuff from Reddit in the fediverse. I don’t want to see the same echo chamber I do everywhere else.

I do want to see more users and more perspectives and a larger user base though. I want to see kindness and compassion. I want to talk to people about topics they are interested in. I want to have relevant discussions without it dissolving into some commentary on some unrelated hot topic thing.

I think calling people normies creates a more toxic, exclusive place which I personally came here to avoid.

Just my two cents! I know for most people using the term it isn’t meant to be malicious, but I think it comes off that way.

Love to hear all of your thoughts.

  • @zeppo@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    82 years ago

    To me it means “not a computer dork”. I always interpreted it as somewhat self-deprecating.

    • XIIIesq
      link
      fedilink
      42 years ago

      Yh, it’s meant to be ironic.

      Fucking normies, REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

      • Adlach
        link
        fedilink
        4
        edit-2
        2 years ago

        The whole “autistic screeching” thing kinda reinforces OP’s point. It’s pretty mean.

        • XIIIesq
          link
          fedilink
          4
          edit-2
          2 years ago

          It reinforces the point that the sort of person that calls other people normies might have mental issues and should not be taken seriously.

        • Rhynoplaz
          link
          fedilink
          12 years ago

          Yeah. I support the use of normies because it’s saying “I’M the weirdo here, and nobody should be expected to know this shit”. The screeching is just annoying and disrespectful to everyone. Anyone who uses it is a child.

  • RxBrad
    link
    fedilink
    8
    edit-2
    2 years ago

    Or…

    “Normie” shows a hint of self awareness that the people on this platform aren’t representative of the general public. We’re a bunch of tech weirdos.

    We’re the “abnormies”.

    • pjhenry1216
      link
      fedilink
      42 years ago

      Pretending there isn’t any condescension toward the “normies” when using the term is blatantly exhibiting the exact behavior the OP referenced. It’s not how inclusivity works in a community at all. It alienates anyone that isn’t already a part of it.

      • RxBrad
        link
        fedilink
        42 years ago

        Why? Because I don’t expect a person who’s not entrenched in a specific hobby to understand the ins-and-outs of that hobby?

        It’s not condescension. It’s setting reasonable expectations.

        • @quasi_moto@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          2
          edit-2
          2 years ago

          No of course it’s reasonable that they wouldn’t understand the ins and outs. The op and commenter you’re replying to are talking about the connotation of the word, not the fact that a hobbyist understands their hobby.

          Take the term Trekkie for example – people who are into star trek can become Trekkies which symbolizes that they’ve joined a community. That term can be used to mean that two people both belong to a community (i.e., “we’re Trekkies”) or it can be used to refer negatively to people in that community by those who aren’t in it (i.e., “Trekkies smell bad”).

          There are (at least) two things happening here that people are picking up on. One is that context matters, and the way that the term normie is often used is not a positive one. I’ve personally never seen anyone refer to themself proudly as a normie, have you? And the other is that we’re referring to normies, a group we ostensibly don’t belong to, as a homogeneous blob which is obviously not accurate.

          I doubt anyone’s feelings are especially hurt if they’re called a normie, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t a dismissive and usually negatively valenced term used to refer to a massive and diverse group of people.

          • RxBrad
            link
            fedilink
            12 years ago

            To me, normie just signifies a person outside a given niche hobby.

            I’m into having a Plex server in my basement. People not into that are normies in a conversation about having a Plex server. I don’t expect them to know how to setup QuickSync hardware encoding in a Plex Docker container.

            I don’t like anime. To people who like anime, I’m the normie. I think Trunks is just a really cool Mastodon client. I only vaguely know it’s also a Dragonball character. If you expect me to know more than this, you’re going to be disappointed.

            There’s no judgment involved.

            • pjhenry1216
              link
              fedilink
              22 years ago

              I mean, read even just half the comments on just one page of comments here and you should see that it’s extremely common to not use the word in the manner you’re stating. We’re not talking about that nor is the poster.

            • @quasi_moto@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              2
              edit-2
              2 years ago

              I agree the way you’re using it doesn’t sound negative. But I don’t think that’s a representative use of this term. Take a look at the top few entries on urban dictionary, they don’t seem very judgement free to me…

              https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Normie

              The point of this post is that even if you don’t mean it in the way that urban dictionary describes it, that’s how some people will interpret it.

    • grady77OP
      link
      fedilink
      32 years ago

      I guess that’s something I didn’t consider. I kind of feel like that is still creating an us vs them mentality though…

      • macniel
        link
        fedilink
        42 years ago

        But that’s pretty much what a group of people is? The people who are inside the group and those that are outside. What is the problem with this?

        • grady77OP
          link
          fedilink
          22 years ago

          I mean not get too far down that rabbit hole, but I would argue that we are all human beings first and we all belong to many different groups, not just one.

          And I think you’re missing my point.

          • macniel
            link
            fedilink
            12 years ago

            of course can groups overlap, and we are all humans but that doesn’t mean that group dynamics are a bad thing?

            • pjhenry1216
              link
              fedilink
              02 years ago

              These aren’t actual group dynamics. In any way. Exclusion and “us vs them” is not a positive group dynamic. Do not promote it.

              • DrNeurohax
                link
                fedilink
                12 years ago

                So you’re saying there are people who DO use “normies” and people that DON’T use “normies”. These are not two groups of people. Shit, I just joined this thread, so that makes ME one of YOU, and there’s OTHERS that aren’t here. Are WE the elitists? Or are THEY the “normies”? YOU said there’s no there’s no US or THEM, so EVERYONE is talking in this thread. ANYONE not in this thread must not exist because I know I exist, so YOU thread posters must exist, but wait, that makes ME an US and YOU a THEM.

                (I’m not trying to be snarky, but this argument is exactly as nonsensical.)

                • pjhenry1216
                  link
                  fedilink
                  02 years ago

                  Buddy, are you ok? You can define “groups” by literally anything. The existence of a delineation is not “group dynamics.” Group dynamics is not the existence of a categorizational model. Group dynamics is the interaction between two groups. And the phrase used was “us vs them” and I will point out that “vs” has a very specific meaning.

                  What the fuck are you on about? You sound like someone on crack for their first time. I never said there was no us or them. I said there’s no reason to have us vs them. I’m not sure what part of reading comprehension you failed at, but you need to improve it.

        • @ttmrichter@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          12 years ago

          You missed to very key letters here. Here’s the original statement with the two key letters highlighted:

          […]creating an us →vs← them mentality though…

          Nobody that I’ve seen here has said that there is no “in” or “out” vis a vis the group. The objection is over those two key letters.

        • pjhenry1216
          link
          fedilink
          12 years ago

          This is absolutely not how you approaching communities. They literally said it creates an Us vs them mentality and you claim that as a positive? Groups are not about us vs them. At all. Nor is it how you build communities. That’s how you create echo chambers and cliques and lead to your own downfall as a community.

        • Zorque
          link
          fedilink
          02 years ago

          The problem isn’t that that exists, it’s when people decide that not being in the group is bad, and not just a casual state of being.

        • genoxidedev1
          link
          fedilink
          02 years ago

          The problem is that generalization exists.

          Every person that ever met or talked to a person that is part of the non-“normie” group does not want to associate with other people that might be in the same group. I’ve experienced it myself often enough even though I don’t consider myself far gone like the people that talk to every “normie” in a condescending way, but they don’t know it.

          I genuinely try to hide the fact that I have fun tinkering with my PC or programming because of that. Because I do not want people that are not tech affinitive to think ‘I’m probably just a stuck-up asshole’.

            • DrNeurohax
              link
              fedilink
              02 years ago

              No no no, it’s stereotyping and prejudice when OTHER people do it to US. WE should tell THEM that THEY are US, and by saying this to OURSELVES we have said it to THEM, so that WE know that THEY know, but now THEY are a THEM again.

              YOU don’t get it. WE get it. YOU should all be like US where there is no YOU and US, there is only the WE that is YOU and US, but thereis no YOU and US, there is only the WE that is YOU and US, but thereis no YOU and US, there is only the WE that is YOU and US, but thereis no YOU and US, there is only the WE that is YOU and US.

              Simple. See? You don’t? But, YOU must because there is no…

              • pjhenry1216
                link
                fedilink
                02 years ago

                What? I’m assuming you are using your same failed understanding of another of my comments here. If you aren’t going to actually point out what you think is wrong, but instead try to illustrate it with nonsensical statements, I can’t honestly pinpoint where communication failed. Just try using basic logic next time if you feel so inclined to elucidate whatever point you’re trying to make.

    • sab
      link
      fedilink
      22 years ago

      There’s a hint of elitism to it though, at least as it’s commonly used.

      I saw a comment the other day that referred to Instagram users as “people you wouldn’t want to associate yourself with”. I don’t know who these people think normal people are.

      • s4if
        link
        fedilink
        12 years ago

        I think it is more self-deprecation than elitism as (in my image) normies tend to have more friends and healier relationship and hobbies.

      • Zorque
        link
        fedilink
        12 years ago

        They probably don’t want to associate with “normal” people because they revel in their “weird” status.

        Which, honestly, is kind of understandable and relatable. People are often mocked and reviled for sticking out, for being different. It makes a sad sort of sense that they’d lash out at those that represent that “normalness” that they’re told they’ll never achieve.

        I certainly don’t think it’s healthy in the long term, but I can at least fathom the logic that got them there.

    • Chariotwheel
      link
      fedilink
      12 years ago

      Tbh, it mostly sounds condescending. Like “they are the normals, as opposed to us, we are the ones that see further than them” a lot of times.

      Though I did have seen things that are clearly self-aware, mostly the “NORMIES OUT REEEE”-stuff. But there is definitely both.

  • @BURN@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    42 years ago

    I think lots of people who use “normie” unironically are creating an us vs them mentality. It’s not malicious, it’s often how they see the world. People who are “abnormal” are often othered in the world and pushed away. This is a way for others to take back being the “out” group in a little way that makes you feel less out of place.

    I’m guilty of it in other facets of my life.

    • XIIIesq
      link
      fedilink
      22 years ago

      I’ve never seen it used unironically, but maybe I’m in different communities.

  • arcturus
    link
    fedilink
    42 years ago

    nah, you’re right

    the term always gives me images of channer culture; like it reminds me when the internet as a whole thought that 4chan and its ilk were cool and elite for being shitty for “lulz”

    it needs to be retired

    • finthechat
      link
      fedilink
      12 years ago

      That’s where it came from. Back in the day when everyone on 4chan was some type of “fag”:

      -Newfag - new users
      -Oldfag - old users
      -Normalfag - normally-adjusted human being not on teh interwebz, later became shortened to “normie”

  • @GregorGizeh@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    32 years ago

    I really dislike that term, it makes me cringe to be considered part of a group that uses it unironically. That’s 4chan speech, let’s keep it in that cesspool.

  • @fubo@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    32 years ago

    A slur always tells you more about the person who uses it than about the person they’re referring to.

    • TwilightVulpine
      link
      fedilink
      02 years ago

      It really does say a lot when the dreaded other that they want to avoid is someone who is normal.

      • @fubo@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        02 years ago

        To be completely blunt about it, if someone uses “normie” seriously, I expect they also think they’re oppressed by age-of-consent laws and possibly also laws against rape. At the very least, they don’t own a TV because there aren’t enough lolis on basic cable.

        • TwilightVulpine
          link
          fedilink
          12 years ago

          Sucks that we have to deal with those types but I wouldn’t go so far lump them all like that. I feel like some of it might involve neurodivergent people who just don’t feel like they get the best of treatment out there. But just this elitism driven by terminally-online brain rot can get bad enough by itself, it’s not a good mindset.

      • @nyar@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        32 years ago

        TERF isn’t a slur, it’s an accurate descriptor.

        Terfs are trans exclusionary. Terfs are on the borders of feminist thought, making them radical (and not in the cool way).

        They only want it to be a slur so they aren’t accurately described as what they are.

        • @Kinglink@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          English
          22 years ago

          Yeah but “Radical”… TERFS ain’t radical, nor bodacious nor totally tubular dude!

          Accept everyone, that’s the TMNT way!

        • @nuzzlerat@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          12 years ago

          Actually I think it is quite a stretch to call them feminists in any way. 99% of the time they ally with the far right and many of their leaders advocate against things like contraception and healthcare for women

      • @Peregrinus@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        02 years ago

        if terf isn’t a slur, Normie isn’t either. people seem to get irrationally upset about the word normal. normal is a well defined word, the same way cis is but it seems one group is fine with one whilst the other isn’t.

        instead of focusing on labels and how much they upset you (I don’t mean who I am replying to), focus on understanding and respecting people’s differences, regardless of terminology.

  • esty
    link
    fedilink
    22 years ago

    i feel some people use it derogatorily but i think of it as more “your average person”, in this context that would be people used to the mainstream networks and haven’t tried anything better

    i try to avoid saying normies because the word kind of has a negative connotation even though some people don’t use it maliciously

  • @morphballganon@mtgzone.com
    link
    fedilink
    2
    edit-2
    2 years ago

    Normie is a term used in many circles, not exclusively fediverse. I don’t think it’s a slur, as the people who use it aren’t inciting violence or enacting discriminatory pricing or whatever. It’s like calling a person boring.

  • @BaldManGoomba@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    22 years ago

    Normies just means people who aren’t in the in group and to me means we are the weird ones, exclusive group or have uncommon interests or knowledge.

    It is important to be self aware that in the context of the fediverse and meme culture things you are use to are weird, different, and sometimes confusing. Perfect example has been the beans and the 3 day poop thing. Normal people don’t get and will think it is weird if they know nothing about the trend. Another example is I am a rock climber if I reference a jug or a sloper it means nothing to normies or people unaware of the lingo. So a jug joke isn’t something other people get

  • genoxidedev1
    link
    fedilink
    12 years ago

    “Normie” is one of the few words that I cringe over everytime I read it. I consider myself to be in, or adjacent to, the group of people that would use that word, since I am tech affinitive and that group is usually the one that uses it. But I cringe everytime I see it used unironically because I don’t want non-tech affinitive (or lesser affinitive) people to lump every person that has something to do with IT or similar into the group of people they don’t want nothing to do with because they’re always condescending towards them.

    It’s literally like as if you’re saying “Did you know that I have an IQ of 150?”.

    You’re not gatekeeping anyone out of your life by using that word, you’re gatekeeping yourself out of every “normal” persons life by using that word.

    • @Ilikecheese@vlemmy.net
      link
      fedilink
      22 years ago

      The internet has a way of taking things that are used sarcastically and removing every bit of irony. The Flat Earth Society, PCMR, and The Donald subreddit all started out as making fun of the people that are now 100% unironically part of very thriving (and toxic to differing levels) communities.

      I think that will almost certainly happen to the word normie, if it hasn’t already.

    • JoeCoT
      link
      fedilink
      12 years ago

      I’ve only really seen it in two contexts. Mainly “don’t scare the normies”, which was largely the advice given to my larp communities to not freak out people in real life with their hobby stuff, and probably also applies to subcultures like furries and such. And secondarily as self-deprecating. I’m a Facebook meme group “Normie Has-Beens” tied to the page “Stale Memes for Normie Has-Beens”, and it’s certainly not people who consider themselves normal.

    • pjhenry1216
      link
      fedilink
      02 years ago

      This post and many of the comments should make it abundantly clear folks have an entirely different experience with the word. I’m not sure what you’re trying to add to the conversation other than to try and claim everyone else doesn’t have valid concerns.

        • pjhenry1216
          link
          fedilink
          02 years ago

          Thoughts can still be provided in a useful fashion without trying to invalidate everyone else’s opinion.

          Edit: I didn’t say your experience invalidated anything. Your choice of words did.

  • magic_lobster_party
    link
    fedilink
    12 years ago

    I’ve always assumed that people who use “normie” in their language are probably teenagers with superiority complex.

  • @WhoRoger@lemmy.world
    link
    fedilink
    1
    edit-2
    2 years ago

    I just see the term to mean the opposite of specialist, or someone who is passionate about the topic.

    In internet terms, it generally means not a geek.

    It’s a good distinction, because for geeks, internet is something inherently interesting on a technological and philosophical level. For, well, normies, it’s just an appliance they don’t need to know much about.

    Similarly if you go to a car show but don’t really know shit about cars other than they have 4 wheels, you’re a normie in that environment. Your requirements on what a car should be like, are fundamentally different from someone who likes to tweak and tinker.

    I wish the term could just mean that without any negative connotations, because I don’t see anything wrong with that distinction.

    Ed/add: Nobody can know everything about every topic, so everyone is a normie in some category. Usually without realising it. So that’s just it. Not necessarily an insult, and doesn’t even make much sense as one, I think.

  • sadreality
    link
    fedilink
    02 years ago

    normie = person who comes into discussion without much understanding of the topic but lacks self awareness to understand their limited perspective.

    classic example would be:

    commenter: Big tech and government collude to spy on us

    normie; I got nothing to hide!

    • pjhenry1216
      link
      fedilink
      12 years ago

      If anyone reads this whole thread, the problem and lack of self awareness of the danger of this word becomes apparent. There are folks who say it means something entirely different than what you just said. It’s clear this is a loaded word and you’re making it clear that it is indeed an insult. Communities grow and your perspective isn’t necessarily always the best. Growth is difficult and differing opinions aren’t always bad. The issue is when people bring hate into it. Tolerance is important, but one can never tolerate intolerance.

      • sadreality
        link
        fedilink
        02 years ago

        Being called out for asine opinions not grounded in reality is part of the growing process.

        Under your logic, bad faith or stupid actors deserve a discussion beyond providing facts. This is the internet, not baby sitting service.

        Community establishes a consensus and if you come with counter point, you better bring facts.

        If the community can’t facethe facts, it will turn into echo chamber.

        Reddit got a ton of those. Trying to step up discourse here though.

        • pjhenry1216
          link
          fedilink
          12 years ago

          That literally isn’t my logic at all. You just made up your own claim and argued against it. I never said they deserve anything beyond admission. You are free to ignore people. You do truly understand that right? You can ignore stupid. You don’t need to discuss with everyone. But not letting them in the room because of some preconceived prejudice is absolutely an asinine opinion and not grounded in reality. I never said you have to discuss things with people. You’re the one who seems to think people are owed some sort of discussion. I’m not even sure where you got such a ridiculous notion. And you even missed the whole point where half this thread literally disagreed with you in regards to what the word means. You’re a prime example of acting elitist and holier than thou for some unknown reason. And then you serve as a prime example of the kind of person you want to keep out. You use ridiculously bad logic and horrible arguments and opinions. Honestly, you’re either a brilliant troll or an atrocious idiot. The line is so thin, it’s hard to tell.

            • pjhenry1216
              link
              fedilink
              12 years ago

              Sorry. But this is yet another example of you not communicating well. What part confused you? I admit I may not be clear, but I can’t fix it with useless criticism. If you are confused by something, let me know. Otherwise, I guess we’re done. If you want to make a poor rebuttal to an argument I made, I don’t see how it’s confusing that I would try to defend it. But please, at least try to communicate effectively.

        • Sentrovasi
          link
          fedilink
          12 years ago

          Facing the facts has very little to do with the choice of using the word “normie”, though: a term which is defined so differently in your original post than everyone else’s that it seems like it would only muddy the waters.